Thursday, April 12, 2012

To Lina, my silly chicken, and my little love, Giada

You’ve turned that corner, the two of you, where you are finally aware of one another. Of the role each of you plays in the other one's world. Big sister, little sister. Companion. Ally. Nuisance. Friend. Even now, in these still very formative years, I see the bond blossoming between the two of you. It reveals itself subtly, peeking through our ordinary, everyday routines. Last night before bath time, Giada perched up on her knees, arms outstretched, playfully reaching for her sister, who was facing the other direction. And Lina, you returned the gesture without making a peep, intuiting what it was your sister needed, leaning backwards and allowing her little hands to latch on to your shoulders. When she tried to pull you closer, you both went tumbling down together, cracking up as you declared quite clearly that "Gigi is a crazy baby!" I swear sometimes the two of you are speaking your own language made up of gestures and squeals in place of words.

Of course these endearing moments do not stand alone. They alternate between pushes, and shoves, and tears, and exclamations of, "Don't touch me, Gigi!" But I like to think of those as terms of endearment as well.

As your mother, I often wonder where the journey of your lives will take you. These thoughts are always hoisted up by some variation of hope; hope that you will find all the wonderful things that I've found in my life (and to side step the not-so-wonderful bits, although that's what makes life, isn't it? The transformative process that can only come from occasionally wandering down the wrong path). It all comes back to hope. Hope that you'll one day fall in love. Hope that you'll feel fulfilled in your passions. Hope that you'll be able to enjoy the incredible gift it is to be a mother. Hope that when I someday come to the end of my journey you'll understand that my greatest joy was always being your mommy.

But more than anything else, I hope that you never find yourselves feeling alone. Because you will always find a friend in one another, even when you're reluctant to do so. Please remember that always as you make your way through this life. Before anyone else, extend a hand to each other. Pull the other one up when she's not strong enough to do it herself. Continue reaching for each other as you do now, even if it sometimes means the two of you tumbling down together.

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